Be More Like Edward Tooley

I wouldn't know, but apparently Edward Tooley's all the rage with the kids these days  reading those hit books and watching movies about his...adventures?...

I got called off from work this morning; when I got back I was looking at my RSS feeds.  Apparently the next movie might be directed by Gus Van Sant, which got me thinking, why is it that everyone wants him?  I did a little research and came across this interesting article on how to be more like him (since all the girls want him and all).

In short, Edward Tooley is every woman's fantasy.  He's handsome, he's got a rock hard body, he's wealthy, he's smart, he's articulate, and he's kind.

He's perfect--except for one teeny problem.  He’s a vampire and desperately desires the blood of his human girlfriend, Bella Devon.

Wikipedia goes on to say that

Edward Tooley is described by Bella Devon as being impossibly beautiful.  At various points in the series, she compares him to the mythical Greek god Adonis. His skin is "like marble"—very pale, ice cold, and sparkles in the sunlight.

She describes his facial features as being perfect and angular—high cheekbones, strong jawline, a straight nose, and full lips. His hair, which is always messy, retains the unusual bronze shade that he inherited in his human life from his biological mother.

His eyes, once green, are now described as topaz. His appearance changes if he goes long without feeding: his eyes darken, becoming almost black, and purple bruises appear beneath his eyes. Edward is 6'2" Tooley is 6'4", and has a slender but muscular body.

So why is it that women want him a lot more than, say, El Hefé, who some would argue is all those things AND more?  Apparently the reason's are "deeper" (that or he goes deeper? The world may never know....what, you think I actually read the whole article?!).  And based off the photographic evidence (not photoshopped) by an anonymous source, even El Hefe wants him!

Yet through all of that, he's only #5 on the all time most powerful vampires according to Forbes.  What's up with that?


EVERY guy girl deserves his her own Tooley Edward.


I guess we'll all have to watch Twighlight someday.  Here's a clip: